The Journey of The Soul
by LyricalRhymeChild
Summary: Guybrush dies and meets a familar character. MI/GF Crossover. Some knowledge of the games are required for some in-jokes. Takes place after CMI but before GF. Please R&R!


Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters   
  
The Journey of the Soul   
  
Prolog   
  
Guybrush stood on the deck of his pirate ship. What a nice day, he thought to himself, when suddenly his ship started to rock. Guybrush looked around frantically. Oh no, was his ship sinking? Was it being eaten by a bunch of carpenter ants? Worse, monkeys were boarding.   
  
Part I: The Invasion   
  
The monkeys jumped over the railings and onto the deck armed with nothing but bananas. "Great, this is just what I need." Guybrush said sarcastically as he drew his sword, "Engard, you flea-bitten banana munchers!" The monkeys weren't afraid; they kept getting closer and closer. Guybrush panicked. He lunged his sword towards one and it jumped out of the way and grabbed his feet with its tail, tripping him and causing him to drop his sword. He slammed into the rubber tree deck and bounced up into the air and came down again, this time hitting a hard spot face first. "I knew I should have gotten a full rubber tree deck. But noooo, Elaine said it would look better if it was part oak." he muttered. As he stood up, he was at the business end of a sword. The monkey on the other end glared at him. "Hey, you look like a monkey I used to have." Guybrush said. Suddenly the sword was thrust into him. He screamed in pain and stumbled backwards. He tripped over the railing and fell along side the vessel. Then, he bounced off of the "plank" and fell into the ocean below.   
  
Part II: Who Says You Can't Die In Lucas Arts Adventure Games?   
  
Everything swirled around and faded to black. Guybrush's life flashed before his eyes. "Oh no, not Pirates of the Caribbean, oh wait..." he said. When it was finally over, Guybrush was snoring.   
  
Part III: Meet Manny   
  
"Buenos Dias. Senor...Threepwood." Said a very familiar voice with a Spanish accent. Guybrush opened his eyes to see himself looking at a skeleton. "Ahh! You're a skeleton!" He exclaimed.   
  
"No, I'm a Calavera, the Skeletons are across the street, amigo. I'm Manny Calavera." Said the skeleton...Calavera...whatever. Guybrush looked around. "Where am I?" he asked.   
  
"You are in the Land of the Dead! Welcome!" said Manny.   
  
"What are you doing here?" Guybrush asked. Manny looked over to the computer and back to him. "I am your travel agent. My job is to find a package that suites you."   
  
"Package?"   
  
"How would you like to get to the Ninth Underworld? Car? Plane? Bus?" he paused "Train?" he said handing Guybrush a pamphlet.   
  
"Actually, I'd rather take the Sea Monkey. Is that thing down here? Because I remember killing it." He said looking around again.   
  
"I'm afraid not muchacho. You were only nineteen when you destroyed it, it sat around for a while until we did something about it."   
  
"What did you do?"   
  
"I'll give you a clue, look at my chair." Guybrush examined the chair closely. "Yep, this is it, here's where I spilled my grog." He said pointing to a spot.   
  
"Anyway, now it's my turn to play travel agent, so if you'll move, I'll figure out how to send you...away." Manny said, sitting in his chair and typing something into his computer.   
  
"Big money, big money, c'mon!" Guybrush said shaking his fists up and down. Manny looked back to him. "Sorry." Guybrush said apologetically.   
  
"Well it seems that you have lead a particularly good life. But unfortunately, you were a kleptomaniac."   
  
"What? I'm not a claustrophobiac! Just because I'm a little afraid of the linen closet doesn't mean..." he was interrupted by Manny, "Por favor." he said looking up at the ceiling and folding his hands. Then, he looked at Guybrush and looked back to the screen. "It says here that you're supposed to get to the Ninth Underworld by this." Manny handed Guybrush a piece of paper. The paper read: GOODLIFE MOTOR TRANSPORTATION UNITS. Good job leading a good life. You now get to travel to the Ninth Underworld in the luxury of the 'XX Death Speeder! "Just give this to the receptionist and she'll give you the keys, then go down to the garage and get your car." Manny explained. Guybrush grabbed the keys.   
  
"One more question."   
  
"Shoot."   
  
"Where's the Ninth Underworld?"   
  
"Don't worry, you'll find it."   
  
Guybrush shrugged and started walking out. On his way out, he walked by a wall high mirror. On it a skeleton followed his every move.   
  
"Aaah! It's one of LeChuck's evil minions!" he said waving his arms. When he realized it was just his reflection, he calmed down a bit. "Where's my hair and skin? First, I lose my mustache and beard and now this." He said angrily as he exited the room.   
  
"He's a piece of work." Manny said, leaning back in his chair.   
  
Part IV: The Receptionist, Glottis, The Petrified Forest, a Scythe, and the Ventriloquist   
  
Guybrush walked down the hall and stopped at the desk at the corner. The hallway turned again and then stopped.   
  
"Ahoy there, I'm Guybrush Threepwood, mighty dead guy."   
  
"Oh, you must be that new guy. Here's your scythe and cloak." Said the receptionist handing Guybrush a scythe and cloak.   
  
"Well actually, I want to redeem this card." He said handing her the piece of paper.   
  
"Oh, let me see that." She eyed it over carefully and handed it back. "I'm sorry, but that one's expired."   
  
"Great." Guybrush said sarcastically and he started back to Manny's office then stopped. "Do you want these back?" he asked holding up the scythe and cloak.   
  
"Nah, keep them, it's our way of sayin' sorry." Guybrush put the scythe and cloak into his pants and started walking back to Manny's. When he got there the window was open and Manny was nowhere in sight.   
  
"Figures." He said. Guybrush exited the room again and walked down the hall. This time he went around the corner and down the elevator. It brought him to a garage. In the corner was a small shack, Guybrush walked over and started banging on the door. A giant orange guy in a mechanics suit came out.   
  
"Yes Mister Cal--" he stopped when he realized it was Guybrush. "Oh, what do you want?"   
  
"Ahoy there, I'm Guybrush Threepwood, mighty skeleton, and I'm lost."   
  
"I'm Glottis and I'm sorry, I can't help unauthorized people." And with that Glottis went back into his shack and closed the door. Then, Guybrush got an idea. He took out the cloak and put it on and knocked on the door again. Glottis returned. "Oh hi Mister Calavera. How was your meeting?"   
  
"Loco, Glottis, just loco." Guybrush said doing his best impression of Manny (good thing he read that ventriloquism book back on Plunder Island).   
  
"So what's the word Mister C.?" Glottis asked seeming convinced.   
  
"Call me Manny. And I was wondering if you could drive me to the..." Guybrush looked around and saw a sign that said "The Petrified Forest 30 Miles". "Petrified Forest."   
  
"Are you sure?"   
  
"Of course I'm sure. Why else would I ask you to drive me there?"   
  
"Good point. Climb in." Glottis said pointing to a car. Guybrush got in and Glottis drove him into the Petrified Forest.   
  
Part V: Year 1   
  
When Guybrush got to the Petrified Forest, he jumped out of the car.   
  
"I'm gonna get outta here, this place gives me the creeps." Glottis said as he drove away.   
  
"Well, it looks like I'm on my own." Guybrush said, taking off his cloak. As he stepped forwards, a huge spider came towards him. "Eeew gross." He said. The spider looked hungry. "All right, have it your way." Guybrush took out his scythe and unfolded it. Then new blade shone in the sun. This frightened the spider into retreating. That was easy. Guybrush thought as he put his scythe away. He started into the forest only to take two steps before stumbling over a rock. "Stupid rock!" he exclaimed and kicked it. The rock flipped over revealing a switch. Guybrush looked perplexed. He bent down and flipped the switch. The ground besides him opened up. He looked at the gaping hole. There was a ladder leading down. Guybrush started climbing down the ladder. At the bottom was a tunnel. He followed it to another ladder. He climbed that one, too. It led into a room. Inside the room, two people or skeletons, were standing around, each one was wearing army clothes. "Yoha." Guybrush said, announcing his arrival. Everyone stopped what he or she was doing.   
  
"Who are you and how did you get here?" said the man angrily.   
  
"I'm Guybrush Threepwood, mighty tired of saying that, and I got here through that trap door under your carpet."   
  
"Now you must die."   
  
"Um, I'm already...dead." Guybrush said.   
  
"Oh yeah, well now you must die...again. Or help us with 'the cause'."   
  
"What's 'the cause'?"   
  
"We are trying to get complete surveillance of the D.O.D. or the Department of Death."   
  
"Where's that?"   
  
"Right over there." He said pointing to his right, "That is where you go when you first die."   
  
"Oh yeah, I've been there. Oh no, am I back in the city?"   
  
"I am afraid so my friend."   
  
"Great. Anyway, why do you want complete surveillance of the D.O.D.?"   
  
"Because we suspect that something bad is going to happen very soon."   
  
"Who's we?"   
  
"The LSA. The Lost Souls Alliance."   
  
"Who are you?"   
  
"I am Salvador Limones, and this is Eva." Salvador said pointing to a woman on a typewriter.   
  
"Hey you're..."   
  
"Yes, and if you tell anyone, you're dead." She said.   
  
"Right. So what do you think is going to happen?"   
  
"We think that the D.O.D. will rot from the inside out. Do you think you could get inside access?"   
  
"Probably. But why can't you or Eva go?"   
  
"Because, I got kicked out of there, for protesting, and Eva could lose her job if she's caught messing around. If we get caught, we will go to the Bone Shredder."   
  
"Well then, what makes me the golden boy?"   
  
"They don't know you, that's what."   
  
"Oh, well, let's go."   
  
"But you don't even know what your mission is yet."   
  
"Oh yeah, I forgot."   
  
"Your mission, if you choose to accept it is..."   
  
"Wait a minute, is this going to be scary, because if it is let me warn you that I'm known to wet my pants and run away screaming, but I've got things to do so..."   
  
"Just listen." Guybrush nodded, "Guybrush, your mission is to sneak into the D.O.D. and find some sort of audio receptor. Like a radio or speakers or something."   
  
"Okay. Let me guess, I need a ship, a map, and a crew, right?"   
  
"No."   
  
"Oh yeah, whoops."   
  
"We're not going island hopping, Guybrush. Well, get to it!"   
  
"Right." Guybrush picked up the carpet.   
  
"Um, Guybrush, use the door." Salvador said pointing towards the door across the room.   
  
"Oh yeah." He dropped the carpet and walked towards the door.   
  
Inside the D.O.D., Guybrush snuck around the halls. Just then, he heard something coming from one of the offices. He slowly crept up to the door and put his ear up to it. He could hear people talking.   
  
"What are ya doing Calavera?!" said one.   
  
"Really, Manny, even you could have done better than that." Said another.   
  
"I didn't know." Said what sounded like Manny.   
  
"You didn't know? Well I bet you didn't know that you just lost your commission! Is that your idea of a joke? Give someone an expired ticket and then leave?" said the first.   
  
"I'm tellin' you, I was kidnapped!" Manny explained.   
  
"Sure, someone just came up to the 43rd story window and kidnapped you, huh?" said the second.   
  
"Exactly." Said Manny pleadingly.   
  
"Get outta here Calavera, you're on a five week suspension." Ordered the first. Guybrush could hear footsteps coming towards the door. He dove behind the receptionist's desk. Manny opened the door and stepped out.   
  
"Five week suspension my bony butt." Manny reached into his pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. Before he could put the cigarette to his mouth, a small whine came from the desk, Manny walked over to it. He saw Guybrush crunched under it.   
  
"Senor Threepwood?" Manny asked.   
  
"Hey Manny." Guybrush responded.   
  
"What are you doing under Eva's desk?"   
  
"Um...I'm looking for the quarter I lost. Oh, wait, here it is!"   
  
"Were you listening in on me gettin' canned?"   
  
"You didn't get canned, you got suspended for five weeks, that's all...oops."   
  
"So you were."   
  
"Alright I'll admit it. Now could you get me out of here before the blood rushes to my head?"   
  
"But you don't have veins."   
  
"Oh, well, in that case, this is just extremely uncomfortable." Manny grabbed Guybrush's boots and pulled him out. "Thanks, now if I could just find that quarter..." said Guybrush searching his pockets.   
  
"Maybe blood rushing to your head isn't a bad idea."   
  
"Did you really get kidnapped?"   
  
"Um...uh...no."   
  
"Then how come when I came to your office you were gone?"   
  
"Because...I...had something to do." Guybrush raised an eyebrow, "I've got a question."   
  
"If it's about the package, there are no refunds."   
  
"No, I was wondering if you guys have any audio receptors."   
  
"What? Audio receptors? You mean like radios? Sure I got one in my office why?"   
  
"Because I need it."   
  
"Why?"   
  
"Top secret."   
  
"Oh, is it one of those pirate things?"   
  
"Um...yeah."   
  
"Fine, whatever, just take the radio." Guybrush followed Manny into his office. Here take it. Manny gave the radio to Guybrush. He dropped it into his pants. Manny's mouth dropped in awe.   
  
"Baggy fit." Guybrush explained.   
  
"Oh."   
  
"Are you sure you can't tell me what this is for."   
  
"Positive. Just meet me outside the building."   
  
"Um...okay."   
  
Back at the LSA HQ...   
  
"Welcome back Mister Threepwood."   
  
"Um...hi."   
  
"Did you bring the 'equipment'?"   
  
"Yep."   
  
"Great, now if you'll just let me see it."   
  
"One minute. What do I get from all of this?"   
  
"The everlasting respect and trust of the LSA."   
  
"Oh in that case." Guybrush handed Salvador the radio.   
  
"Beautiful." He said, "Eva, see if you can get this to work." Salvador handed Eva the radio. She pushed the typewriter to the side and started fiddling with the electronics.   
  
"I Salvador Limones of the LSA salute you, Guybrush Threepwood." Salvador said saluting Guybrush.   
  
"It was nothing, really."   
  
"You are a great ally to 'the cause'."   
  
Back topside...   
  
Manny was sitting on the steps of the D.O.D. smoking a cigarette. "C'mon Guybrush, today..." he muttered to himself. Then, Guybrush walked out from a nearby alley. Manny dropped his cigarette and stepped on it to put it out.   
  
"Took ya." He said.   
  
"Hey, I had some very important business to attend to." Guybrush said defensively.   
  
"Alright, alright, whatever. Can we just get outta here?"   
  
"Okay, but where are we to go?"   
  
"How about Rubacava?" Manny suggests.   
  
"Ruba-whata?" Guybrush asked, confused (as usual).   
  
"Rubacava, it's pretty much the entertainment capital of the Land of the Dead."   
  
"Sounds like fun, let's go." Manny looked at one of the signs that hung over the highway.   
  
"It's only 75 miles from here."   
  
"75 miles!" Guybrush almost had a heart attack (well he would have if he had a heart).   
  
"Looks like we're gonna have to get a ride."   
  
"A fast one."   
  
"But where? We can't drive..."   
  
"I know! We can get Glottis to drive us."   
  
"Who's Glottis?"   
  
"He's this big orange guy that works in the garage."   
  
"Oh yeah, the mechanic. No can do."   
  
"Why not?"   
  
"He's a demon, demons can only drive to the Land of the Living and back to the D.O.D. and that's it."   
  
"Well it looks like we're walking."   
  
"Yep. Let's get going." Manny and Guybrush followed the road that leads to Rubacava.   
  
Part VI: Year 2   
  
A year later, Manny and Guybrush finally arrive at Rubacava.   
  
"Oh man, that was a long walk!" said Manny.   
  
"You're tellin' me." Guybrush replied. Then, a group of skeletons approached them.   
  
"Hello." Said one.   
  
"Greetings." Said another.   
  
"Welcome to Rubacava." Said a third.   
  
"Who are you?" asked Manny.   
  
"We are the Rubacava Welcoming Committee." Said the second.   
  
"Who are you?" asked the first.   
  
"I'm Guybrush Threepwood, mighty pirate." Answered Guybrush.   
  
"And I'm Manny Calavera."   
  
The three men looked at each other.   
  
"Okay...now what?" asked the third.   
  
"I don't know." Said the first.   
  
"Well, I guess that's it then, huh?" asked the second.   
  
"I guess." Manny responded. The three men walked away.   
  
"That was odd." Guybrush said.   
  
"Very." Manny agreed.   
  
"Well, I guess we'd better get goin' into town."   
  
"Yeah." Guybrush and Manny walked into Rubacava. The center of Rubacava was quiet. No one was around.   
  
"Weird." Manny said.   
  
"Yup." Guybrush replied.   
  
"Where is everyone?"   
  
"No clue." Then someone came up to them.   
  
"Hello, I'm taking a survey. Would you like to participate, sir?"   
  
"Um...okay." Manny answered.   
  
"What do you prefer more? Canned cat food, or the bag stuff?"   
  
"Um...I hate cats altogether."   
  
"Well then, what is your cat FOOD preference?"   
  
"I don't eat it on a regular basis, so I really don't have one."   
  
"Okay, just forget that question. Which can opener do you fancy? The Cut-o-matic or the Slicer Dicer?"   
  
"All of the food I eat is pre-cooked, refried, and crushed up, and plus, it comes in a box."   
  
"Nevermind that one, and that one, that one too..." the man said crossing off things on his checklist, "Okay, I've got one, where did you purchase your last suit?"   
  
"What this one?" Manny said pointing to the suit he was wearing.   
  
"Um...I guess."   
  
"At some auction."   
  
"You are impossible!" The man dropped the clipboard and pen and walked away.   
  
"Gee, that went over well."   
  
"Oh yeah." Manny bent down and picked up the clipboard and pen.   
  
"Hey what's that over there?" Guybrush asked pointing to a giant crowd of people.   
  
"I don't know chico, let's go check it out." When Manny and Guybrush got to where the crowd was, they were stopped by a huge bodyguard.   
  
"Where do you think you're going?" he asked.   
  
"Um...in there." Manny said pointing to a door.   
  
"Not on my watch. This is the set for the new Johnny Thunder movie and not everyone can get in."   
  
"Oh I see how it is."   
  
"Yep, that's exactly how it is." Guybrush rushed Manny back into the crowd.   
  
"What is it essey?" Manny asked.   
  
"I've got a plan. Just follow my lead." Guybrush put on his cloak and unfolded his scythe.   
  
"Where'd you get that? Those were only issued to D.O.D. 'travel agents'."   
  
"I'll tell you later. Just take out that pen and clipboard." Manny took out the pen and clipboard. He followed Guybrush back to the bodyguard. "Hello, we're here for the movie."   
  
"Who're you guys?"   
  
"Extras." Answered Manny.   
  
"Oh, go ahead in." Guybrush and Manny walked into the building. Inside, a bunch of people were running around and reading lines and doing that sort of stuff.   
  
"Wow!" Guybrush exclaimed.   
  
Meanwhile back at the D.O.D....   
  
The first voice who happened to be Manny's boss Don Copal was talking to the second voice who happened to be Manny's opponent Domino Hurley.   
  
"What do you think we should do about Manny when he gets back?"   
  
"If he gets back." Said Domino.   
  
"What do you mean 'if'?"   
  
"Well, the way I see it, if we can get Hector here before the five week suspension is over, then we can make sure that Manny will never return."   
  
"How do ya figure?"   
  
"We can just get Hector or his henchmen to make sure Cali doesn't make it back to the D.O.D....alive."   
  
"But you're forgetting one small thing, Dom..."   
  
"What's that?"   
  
"HE'S ALREADY DEAD!"   
  
"Ever hear of a Sproutella?"   
  
"A what?"   
  
"A Sproutella. It's a gun that shoots darts that contain a special chemical that when it touches bone it begins to sprout into a flower causing the person to have a slow and agonizing death...again."   
  
"Oh...I get your plan. You want Hector to threaten Manny with this 'Sproutella' until he just leaves."   
  
"Exactly and if he doesn't leave then we can sprout him." Dom said smiling at his own genius.   
  
"Anything that will stop Calavera from interfering with our plans." Don answered, "Just one thing. Where is Hector going to get a whole bunch of Sproutella?"   
  
"He has a man to make it for him."   
  
"Brilliant Dom, just brilliant. I think I'll promote you. You can have Manny's office, just move his stuff into the Supply Closet." The two laughed at their evil plan.   
  
Meanwhile back to Brush Boy and Bonehead...   
  
Manny walked up to what looked like the director.   
  
"Hola mi amigo! What's with all the commotion?"   
  
"Well..." he said looking around, "there's been a rumor to have been a bomb on the set!" he said jumping at the word 'bomb'.   
  
"Bomb?! Who would do such a thing?" Manny asked.   
  
"If you can find it and disarm it, I'll get you a part in this movie." Guybrush's eyes lit up. Manny looked at him and shook his head.   
  
"Alright, we'll do it."   
  
"Good but hurry!"   
  
"Right." Manny and Guybrush departed the director to go find the bomb.   
  
"Alright here's the plan." Guybrush started, "I'll search this hall and you search that one." He said pointing across the room, "And meet me back here."   
  
"Okay. Let's go." Manny walked across the room. Here goes nothing. Guybrush thought. He went door to door but found nothing. I hope Manny is having better luck than I am. He thought. Manny on the other hand was having a great time "bomb-searching". He got to see all of the stars dressing rooms and he even got a few autographs, but no bomb. He returned to Guybrush.   
  
"Any luck?" Guybrush asked.   
  
"Nope. You?" Manny responded.   
  
"Negative." Suddenly, they heard a beeping.   
  
"What's that?" Manny asked.   
  
"Um...I think it's the bomb. But where is it?"   
  
"Sounds like it's coming from underneath the floor." Manny bent down and put his "ear" to the linoleum, "Yep, it's coming from the floor." He confirmed. He pulled his scythe out and started digging up the linoleum. Luckily, no one noticed. The "bomb" was a ball of wires with another thicker wire leading off back into the ground.   
  
"Peace of cake." Guybrush said taking out his scythe. With one swing he cut threw the thick wire disarming the bomb. "These things come in handy!" he exclaimed. Manny looked amazed, "Wow. That was pretty easy. What parts in the movie do you think we'll get?"   
  
"I dunno, but I sure hope I don't get stuck being a tree...again."   
  
"Nah, these people look way more upper-class."   
  
Later...   
  
Back on the set, Guybrush is dressed as a tree holding apples, while Manny is on all fours dressed as a deer. "Way more upper-class, huh?!" Guybrush said angrily.   
  
"Hey, looks can be deceiving." Manny said defensively.   
  
After the show...   
  
"That had to have been the most embarrassing thing I have ever done." Manny said.   
  
"Yeah, and I think I got a rash from that stupid tree costume." Guybrush said, scratching his arm. Suddenly, they heard someone coming. He was a very tall, fat man in a fez.   
  
"Now where's this Calavera character?" he asked.   
  
"I don't know. Copal said that he would be here somewhere, Hector." Said the fat man's assistant. Copal?! Manny thought. He quickly grabbed Guybrush and they hid behind a dumpster.   
  
"What?!" Guybrush asked.   
  
"Those guys are looking for me." Manny explained.   
  
"Give me my gun." Hector (the fat man) said. His assistant handed him a Sproutella. Hector quickly pocketed it and then looked around to see if anyone saw. A gun? For what? Manny thought. "Have you seen him anywhere, Bowsely?"   
  
"No sir. I haven't." Bowsely responded.   
  
"Oh well, it's pointless sitting here and chatting away, while this Calavera fellow gets a chance to leave Rubacava." Hector said as he turned to leave. When he and Bowsely were finally gone, Manny and Guybrush emerged from their hiding place.   
  
"Well, now I know we need to get out of here." Manny said.   
  
"Where can we go?"   
  
"Well, we can't go back to El Marrow, that's for sure. And we have to get out of here before 'Hector' finds me."   
  
"How about the Petrified Forest?" Guybrush asked.   
  
"Petrified Forest?"   
  
"Yeah, it's this place I went to before I met up with you...again."   
  
"What's it like there?"   
  
"Well...it's petrified...and it's...a forest."   
  
"Wow, what vivid imagery!" Manny said sarcastically.   
  
"You have to see it for yourself."   
  
"Oh, is that it?"   
  
"Yeah."   
  
"Oh, well then...let's go."   
  
"One thing."   
  
"What?"   
  
"I have no idea how to get there."   
  
"Great." Guybrush pulled out the pamphlet that Manny gave him about the Land of the Dead. "Ah-ha!" he exclaimed, "There's a map in here. I can't believe I found this."   
  
"And I can't believe that you kept that thing."   
  
"It says that if we go north, then we will get there in no time." Guybrush said pointing north.   
  
"Great."   
  
Part VII: Year 3   
  
Manny and Guybrush finally make it to the Petrified Forest after a year of traveling. "Get here in no time, huh?" Manny asked crossly as he sat on a nearby rock.   
  
"Well on the map it looks like such a short distance." Guybrush answered sitting on another rock.   
  
"I'll bet that you didn't know that every inch on the map stands for 50 miles, now did you?"   
  
"Um...no." Manny shook his head again.   
  
"So what's here anyway?"   
  
"Last time I was here I saw the biggest spider in the world!" Guybrush exclaimed.   
  
"Oh boy, big deal." All of a sudden, a huge spider crawled out of the nearby woods. "Oh ick." Manny said.   
  
"Big deal, huh?" Manny took out his scythe and chopped up the spider. "Not really." He answered, " Anyone want spider cakes?"   
  
"Funny." Guybrush answered sarcastically, "There really is nothing here."   
  
"Yeah, well at least I'm away from that Hector guy."   
  
"True, but while we here we'll probably die anyway."   
  
"What do you mean, muchacho?"   
  
"FROM BOREDOM!!!"   
  
"Okay, okay, chill out essey!"   
  
"You still never told me where the Ninth Underworld is."   
  
"They say it's at a big gate. Guarded by 'The Guardian'. They say he has a list of who can go on and who has to stay or go...down."   
  
"Down? What's 'down'?"   
  
"It's where you go when you have either lead a bad life, or done something terrible in the Land of the Dead."   
  
"Oh I see. Which one do you think you'll go to?"   
  
"Neither."   
  
"Why?"   
  
"I'm not even close to done serving my time in the Land of the Dead." There was quiet for a while until Guybrush spoke up. "Do you think I'll make it?"   
  
"I don't know chico, you were a pirate, and a kleptomaniac."   
  
"You had to bring that up again, didn't you?"   
  
"But on the plus side, you did help a lot of people."   
  
"And defeating evil zombie pirates must get me some brownie points, right?"   
  
"Who? LeChuck?" Guybrush nodded, "Nah, he's a regular at the D.O.D."   
  
"How come you haven't sent him to the Ninth Underworld yet?"   
  
"LeChuck? Think about it, that guy has more community service to do than a guy convicted with murder 20 times, no bail, no parole, and a double life sentence."   
  
"Oh I get it. Well are we gonna move? 'Cause my butts' goin' numb."   
  
"Might as well." Manny and Guybrush stood up.   
  
Back at the D.O.D....   
  
"Where is Calavera?!" Don said annoyed.   
  
"Calm down, Cali will be here." Domino said.   
  
"He better be. Has Hector come in yet?"   
  
"Nope. I haven't even heard from Bowsely."   
  
"Great." Don said hitting his fist on the desk. Just then, the phone rang.   
  
"Hello?" Dom said answering it. "Yeah...yep...of course...okay...I'll tell him...bye." He hung up.   
  
"Who was that?"   
  
"It was Hector. He said that he might be a bit later than expected."   
  
"Later?! Why?"   
  
"He says he's found our little buddy."   
  
Back at the Petrified Forest...   
  
Manny and Guybrush were following a hidden path they found.   
  
"And then I said: How appropriate, you fight like a cow, and he dropped his sword and ran away like a little girl."   
  
"Wow, sounds like you had a great life."   
  
"Yeah." Guybrush said dreamily, "How 'bout you?"   
  
"Definitely not as exciting as yours."   
  
"So what did you do in life to get stuck working in the D.O.D.?"   
  
"I have know idea what evil sin I committed to get stuck working at that Godforsaken place."   
  
"It must've been real bad."   
  
"Yep." Then, they heard a rustling in the bushes. "Hello?" Manny said, "Is anyone there? Yoo-hoo!" Hector jumped out of the bushes. "Well, if it isn't Manuel Calavera. How've you been Manny?"   
  
"Great until now." Manny responded. Hector drew his gun, "Oh, believe me it's about to get a lot worse. Now who's your little friend?"   
  
"My name's Guybrush Threepwood, prepare to die...again!" Guybrush said taking out his scythe, Manny followed suit.   
  
"Two on one? That doesn't seem fair. BOWSELY!" Hector's assistant Bowsely jumped out of the bushes. He pulled out another Sproutella, "That's better isn't it?"   
  
"Not really, two guns against two scythes really doesn't seem that fair."   
  
"Shut up Peepwood." Hector said.   
  
"B...b...but boss...I'm a florist..." Bowsely stammered.   
  
"No, you're my Floral Weapons Expert!" he said angrily.   
  
"You gonna fight me or do I have to set my alarm clock?" Manny said.   
  
"Ya know, Creepwoods' got a point." Hector said taking out a scythe.   
  
"I would really like to know how you guys are getting those, 'cause I could use a backup." Manny said.   
  
"We are going to do a new kind of fighting..." Hector started.   
  
"Wait, let me guess, insult scythe fighting, right?" Guybrush asked.   
  
"Exactly." Hector responded.   
  
"Figures."   
  
"Say what?" Manny said confused.   
  
"Remember that story I told you?"   
  
"Yeah."   
  
"That."   
  
"Oh...okay."   
  
"Just follow my lead."   
  
"Right."   
  
"Go first, Seepwood."   
  
"Alright. I once had a dog that was smarter than you."   
  
"He must have taught you everything you know." Hector started slashing towards Guybrush. Manny and Bowsely stood on the side watching.   
  
"I've seen apes that are more polite than you!" Hector stated.   
  
"Um...how appropriate, you fight like a cow." Hector started slashing towards Guybrush again.   
  
"You're the ugliest creature I've ever seen in my life."   
  
"I'm shocked that you've never gazed at your wife!" Guybrush just turned the tables. He started slashing towards Hector.   
  
"Only once have I met such a coward."   
  
"Oh yeah?!"   
  
"Give up now or I'll crush you like a grape!"   
  
"Oh yeah." The final insult, Hector stumbled backwards as Guybrush slashed towards him.   
  
"Okay, you win Deepsood! I give up!"   
  
"It's THREEPWOOD!!!" Guybrush said angrily as he cut through Hector's suit. Hector froze in fright. "I'm...sorry...I'm...p...please...stop..." He turned around and ran. Bowsely followed close behind. Guybrush folded up his scythe.   
  
"Good show, mano!" Manny said patting Guybrush on the back, "But I have a feeling that Hector will return."   
  
"Well, until then, let's get out of here."   
  
"Okay. Where to?"   
  
"Let's go find this 'gate'." Guybrush suggested.   
  
"Alright, but this time, let me hold the map."   
  
Part VIII: Year 4   
  
Manny and Guybrush walked up to a giant Inca temple. A man in an Inca outfit was sitting in a box up high with a book in his lap.   
  
"Name?" the man asked.   
  
"Guybrush Threepwood." Guybrush said.   
  
"Um...let me see. Oh, here you are. You should have been here four years ago. Where were you?"   
  
"We kinda got held up."   
  
"I see. Well then, go ahead." Guybrush turned to Manny, "Are you coming?" Manny just stood there. "Sorry muchacho. I still have work to do here."   
  
"Oh...okay. See you someday."   
  
"Maybe." Guybrush turned and walked into the gate. It opened and a bright white light shone through. He stepped in.   
  
Epilog   
  
Guybrush opened his eyes. He was lying on the deck of his ship and staring at the blue sky. He looked around and stood up. He rubbed his head. Had everything been a dream? Or had he got a second chance? He looked up and saw a cloud that looked familiar. It was a skull and it smiled. It was Manny. 


End file.
